life is beautiful.
It really is. Endless possibilities ahead.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
The story.
For those of you from church, etc., who are probably wondering what in the world is going on.
As you may know, EMU requires that each student complete a cross-cultural to graduate. One or two trips are offered each semester, as well as multiple programs each summer. I knew I wanted to do the full, semester-long program, and I had to do it in the spring in order to avoid missing a season of field hockey. Before arriving at EMU last fall, I had planned to go to Guatemala in the spring of my sophomore or junior year. Then I heard about the Middle East cross-cultural in the spring of '08, during my sophomore year. I became very passionate about the idea of traveling there and decided to apply for the trip despite the fact that it is a competitive program and few underclassmen get in. Judgment day arrived...and I didn't get in. I was quite upset, but knew that God had a reason and someting better would come up.
In addition to traveling abroad for a semester, I was also hoping to do an internship program in Washington, D.C. during the spring of my junior year. Because I would like to be on campus my entire senior year, that meant I needed to do my cross-cultural this coming spring. Guatemala was the only other option, so I applied. This program is less competitive and preference is given to those who had not been selected to other trips, so I felt confident about my chances of getting in. Once again, however, I was not chosen for the program.
By this point I was extremely frustrated. I felt like all my plans were messed up now (funny how that works when we try to plan things "perfectly") and I had no idea what to do. I started looking into non-EMU cross-culturals, and became very interested in a program through the Council for Christian Colleges and Universities. However, the more I thought and prayed about it this summer, I began to feel that applying for that program was not the right decision. I wanted to want to go, but it simply didn't seem right. So I changed my mind again, and decided to forget the D.C. internship, and just go to India with EMU's program during the spring of my junior year. This seemed like the right decision...until I came back to school. As I began to think about cross-culturals again, I became unsettled. The more I told people I was planning to go to India, the less right it felt. This started to scare me, as I felt like I had no options left. I kept praying (as I had through the whole process) that God would direct my cross-cultural process and that he would make it clear to me where I was to go. He answered that prayer in a way I hadn't even allowed myself to hope for...
Last weekend, I arrived back at school after playing several hockey games in PA. I checked my email, and as I scanned the unread list, I saw one from the Middle East cross-cultural leader. The subject line: "Middle East cross-cultural opening." My heart started racing, and I opened it to find that someone had dropped out of the trip and they were offering her place to me. I was absolutely stunned. I had never lost my desire to go to the Middle East. In fact, the alternate program I looked at was simply a different trip to the ME. This, however, is far better, and I would much prefer to go with a group from EMU. I couldn't believe this was real, so I decided to take a few days to think and pray about it, just to make sure that accepting the spot would be the right decision. I wanted to feel confirmation that the reason I didn't get in in the first place was because I needed to learn something, not because I really wasn't supposed to go. I chose not to tell any friends until I had made a decision, but I called my parents. Mom's reaction caught me off guard...after her initial gasping (;)), she said, "I'm not surprised at all. The Middle East cross-cultural has been on my heart this weekend and I've just had a feeling that a spot would open up for you." To me, that was tremendous confirmation. After 24 hours of thought and prayer, I emailed the leader to say I was accepting the place.
It just feels so right. I'm amazed at God's faithfulness throughout this six-month struggle and the subtle ways he worked to lead me to this place. Not getting into Guatemala...deciding for and then against multiple other options...and finally simply deciding not to make any plans for this spring...all of those steps brought me here, where I can pick up and go without needing to rearrange many plans at all. This has been my greatest desire all along, and I am so very grateful for the opportunity. I'm also thankful for the lessons learned along the way. It has been a humbling experience and I feel very blessed. I really can't express my excitement and gratitude! I'd also appreciate your prayers for our group as we prepare to leave in just over four months.
For those of you from church, etc., who are probably wondering what in the world is going on.
As you may know, EMU requires that each student complete a cross-cultural to graduate. One or two trips are offered each semester, as well as multiple programs each summer. I knew I wanted to do the full, semester-long program, and I had to do it in the spring in order to avoid missing a season of field hockey. Before arriving at EMU last fall, I had planned to go to Guatemala in the spring of my sophomore or junior year. Then I heard about the Middle East cross-cultural in the spring of '08, during my sophomore year. I became very passionate about the idea of traveling there and decided to apply for the trip despite the fact that it is a competitive program and few underclassmen get in. Judgment day arrived...and I didn't get in. I was quite upset, but knew that God had a reason and someting better would come up.
In addition to traveling abroad for a semester, I was also hoping to do an internship program in Washington, D.C. during the spring of my junior year. Because I would like to be on campus my entire senior year, that meant I needed to do my cross-cultural this coming spring. Guatemala was the only other option, so I applied. This program is less competitive and preference is given to those who had not been selected to other trips, so I felt confident about my chances of getting in. Once again, however, I was not chosen for the program.
By this point I was extremely frustrated. I felt like all my plans were messed up now (funny how that works when we try to plan things "perfectly") and I had no idea what to do. I started looking into non-EMU cross-culturals, and became very interested in a program through the Council for Christian Colleges and Universities. However, the more I thought and prayed about it this summer, I began to feel that applying for that program was not the right decision. I wanted to want to go, but it simply didn't seem right. So I changed my mind again, and decided to forget the D.C. internship, and just go to India with EMU's program during the spring of my junior year. This seemed like the right decision...until I came back to school. As I began to think about cross-culturals again, I became unsettled. The more I told people I was planning to go to India, the less right it felt. This started to scare me, as I felt like I had no options left. I kept praying (as I had through the whole process) that God would direct my cross-cultural process and that he would make it clear to me where I was to go. He answered that prayer in a way I hadn't even allowed myself to hope for...
Last weekend, I arrived back at school after playing several hockey games in PA. I checked my email, and as I scanned the unread list, I saw one from the Middle East cross-cultural leader. The subject line: "Middle East cross-cultural opening." My heart started racing, and I opened it to find that someone had dropped out of the trip and they were offering her place to me. I was absolutely stunned. I had never lost my desire to go to the Middle East. In fact, the alternate program I looked at was simply a different trip to the ME. This, however, is far better, and I would much prefer to go with a group from EMU. I couldn't believe this was real, so I decided to take a few days to think and pray about it, just to make sure that accepting the spot would be the right decision. I wanted to feel confirmation that the reason I didn't get in in the first place was because I needed to learn something, not because I really wasn't supposed to go. I chose not to tell any friends until I had made a decision, but I called my parents. Mom's reaction caught me off guard...after her initial gasping (;)), she said, "I'm not surprised at all. The Middle East cross-cultural has been on my heart this weekend and I've just had a feeling that a spot would open up for you." To me, that was tremendous confirmation. After 24 hours of thought and prayer, I emailed the leader to say I was accepting the place.
It just feels so right. I'm amazed at God's faithfulness throughout this six-month struggle and the subtle ways he worked to lead me to this place. Not getting into Guatemala...deciding for and then against multiple other options...and finally simply deciding not to make any plans for this spring...all of those steps brought me here, where I can pick up and go without needing to rearrange many plans at all. This has been my greatest desire all along, and I am so very grateful for the opportunity. I'm also thankful for the lessons learned along the way. It has been a humbling experience and I feel very blessed. I really can't express my excitement and gratitude! I'd also appreciate your prayers for our group as we prepare to leave in just over four months.
The deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: Thy will be done. Acceptance of whatever that means is the great victory of faith that overcomes the world. -Elisabeth Elliot
Soli Deo Gloria.
Sunday, September 02, 2007
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